Friday, April 2, 2010

missing my friend

This Easter has been an emotional one so far.  The other day I was driving to school and listening to an interview with Amy Grant.  She was talking about her family traditions.  They have a big easter egg hunt.  She has a bunch of sisters and they all have kids and some of the kids now have kids.  Their hunt has some pretty big prizes.  She was saying that she feels that faith is a lot like a hunt.  It is a big adventure and you never know what you are going to find, but you know that it is going to be good.   Then  they played her acoustic version of "I can only imagine".  I couldn't help myself.  I lost it.  It was Maundy Thursday, and I was heading to Chapel, and I immediately thought of Janet.  I thought of how amazingly happy she was to be in Heaven and how she was no longer imagining what it was like, but I was.  I knew immediately that she didn't want me to be sad for her, but I wasn't.  I was sad for me.  I miss her.  I am sad for sweet Naomi who is facing each day without her amazing mommy.  I am sad for John who is trying to figure out life without his soulmate.  I am sad that  Footsteps to the Cross happened and it was amazing, and Janet would have been so proud, but she wasn't here to see it.  I am sad that this most joyous and triumphant of times is upon us and I am going to get to shout HE IS RISEN! HE IS RISEN INDEED! HALLELUJAH!! and Janet won't he here to hug me and give me a big Easter kiss.  I miss our hugs, I miss our talks, I miss my Janet.